A little less Hollywood, a little more baseball and apple pie.

After several posts defending life in a socialized country and clarifying some aspects of life in Europe in general; and after a discussion of the stereotypical life in the US yesterday with some Swedish classmates, it is time to represent my home land.  A few weeks ago, we read a little paragraph in Swedish class intended to teach us how to use countries properly as adjectives.  Such as, "I watched a German movie about beer."  Or, "I watched an Italian movie about the mafia."  The United States:  "I watched an American movie about.... PLASTIC SURGERY!"  We get plastic surgery!  Not as if the stereotypes for German, Italy or whatever other country is better... but we still get plastic surgery!

At the beginning of the school year, a classmate of my youngest daughter asked her if she sees celebrities all of the time in the US.  Bear in mind, we live in the suburbs of northern Colorado.  The only celebrities we might happen across are our local weather personalities.  Later, A friend of my oldest daughter asked if she had ever seen a "cowboy."  Well, technically, my own father is a cattle rancher, which by all definitive definitions would, in fact, make him a "cowboy."  We grew up in southeastern Colorado, consisting almost entirely of "cowboys."  When Meagan said she had most likely seen a cowboy (of course not sure what indeed constitutes a "cowboy" in the mind's eye of a fifteen year old European girl), the friend asked her if she was scared when she saw him.  As endearing as the celebrity spotting question was, or as amusing is the chap-wearing, horse-galloping, boot-sporting, chivalry-bearing imaginative fascination, the most troubling questions we are very frequently asked are about violence-- particularly relating to shootings.

Before I become overly defensive or a little pretentious, I guess I should step back for a moment to a place of objectivity.  Yep...I guess I think it's pretty fair to have these impressions of the US really.  How can they not?  The tv programs we have over here are all exploit and glamorize this uncommon, yet concretely imbedded mindset of the US.  Keep in mind, we have a lot of American television in Sweden, which in itself isn't that uncommon; but here, it isn't dubbed over with Swedish like it is dubbed in most countries with their own language.  So, it feels more real that way.  It feels...authentic.   "Authenticity" in the form of Cops, The Hills, Playboy's The Girls Next Door, Dr. 90210, CSI Miami (New York, LA...anywhere ominous murderers are somewhat plausible), Jerry Springer, My Sweet 16...

I was born in the US and lived there my whole life until over a year ago when we moved here.  I feel like I'm a pretty good first hand resource on what life is "really" like in the US.  I mean, I have thirty years to pool from.  But still, no one will really believes me.  After being subjected to American television for their whole lives, people here (and I am not referring to just Swedes; many nationalities in fact) feel very confident in their impression of life back home.  I made a sarcastic comment about how Americans are nothing more than a bunch of  "plastic surgeried-gun toting-materialistic-overconsuming-environmental wreckers" and this was met with several variations of the phrase "EXACTLY!" 

In one paragraph, I can say this about my day to day life in the United States:  it's actually quite boring!!  We live in suburbia.  We work 40 hours a week, drive our kids to school, run errands at Walmart, have BBQs with our neighbors, take weekend drives to the Rocky Mountains, go to church on Sundays, shop clearance sales at the mall, mow our lawns on Saturday, take our dog for a walk in the evenings .  Maybe, once in a while, I get really crazy and go get a manicure.  Heck, sometimes we really go for it and drive our six year old Hyundai forty minutes into downtown Denver and go have a nice dinner or go to a nightclub. 

But, the United States is just too gigantic to over generalize.  Some one in Manhattan would have a completely different paragraph, as would someone in LA, Dallas, Las Vegas or Miami.  When I went to Los Angeles for the MTV Movie Awards and the Mr. and Mrs. Smith movie premier, the Lamborghinis and Louis Vuitton  cladden super-thin breast augmented women were as foreign and fascinating to me as the women were in any of the many countries we've visited like China or Morocco.  They just don't represent the whole of our country.  They are a small square in a massive tapestry.

I can quite honestly say this:  I don't know a single person that owns a gun.  I have never, in 32 years of life, known anyone to be shot.  I do believe in our second Amendment Constitutional right to bear arms, but I don't personally want to own a gun.  That's my right; that's my freedom to choose.  Guns are available in the US, but they should be!  I'm a quasi-vegetarian, but I believe in the freedom to hunt and I believe in the freedom to protect oneself if they deem it necessary.  I believe in the freedom to choose many things as an American---if anything, our country has pulled too far away from a person's right to make their own choices, to choose their own existence.

Yes, we're loud and we're competitive and we do love to keep up the Jones' (just to over generalize for one second).  However, when something catastrophic happens like 9/11, we all band together in this beautiful unity of patriotism and camaraderie.  When a tsunami hits Thailand, we send our financial resources along with our personal skills and resources for aid and assistance.  When a police officer dies, we raise money for funds for his children's college tuition and have candle-light vigils in his memory.  We mourn these injustices together.   We may not be a perfect country, but we are a generous, compassionate, friendly and thoughtful one.

What we also are, though, without a doubt, is innovative, creative and  imaginative... Think Disneyworld, iPods, Las Vegas, youtube, Super Bowl commercials, Guitar Hero, Pixar...   We're the masters of entertainment, fantasy and stimulation, which each is universally appreciated!  We've seen old re-runs of Friends in nearly every country we've visited, even Morocco---and guess what??  There, Rachel 'speaks' in Arabic!  The bottom line is, watching American TV isn't any more a real perspective of life  in the US than riding the Matterhorn at Disneyland is seeing Switzerland.  Hollywood is a land of pretend, and people make money by. . . (drum roll). . . PRETENDING!  I'm not sure why producers want to push the fantasy of violence, but I can quite assure you, we never have crime scene investigators roaming around our neighborhood with caution tape, lab equipment and body bags.  I'm so sorry to disappoint you.  No celebrities, or hundred thousand dollar birthday parties, or wrestling-hair-pulling-chair-throwing rednecks screaming about someone sleeping with their uncle's friend's cousin, or bikini clad mid-40s housewives sitting around sipping mojitos and checking out the cabana boy.  Sorry.  Not in my neighborhood anyway.  

Socialism…the word we Capitalists are taught to hate

After a few rousing debates on the perils of socialism on facebook and of course every time I’m home in Colorado, I couldn’t help but to find the following videos hilarious.  I am never sure what people imagine Sweden to be like in this economic sense; but, from the comments and questions, it seems like it is a heartless and bitter world where people have no control of their own lives and work long and anguishing hours in meaningless jobs for the advantage of those insidious moochers that corrupt and starve the system.

Now, I’m not going to say there aren’t annoying aspects of socialism here.  For example, there is one government controlled liquor store called the Systembolaget.  The intent is to control alcohol intake, hence creating a place with the lowest drinking and driving in the world.  “Systembolaget, the Swedish Alcohol Retail Monopoly, exists for one reason: To minimize alcohol-related problems by selling alcohol in a responsible way, without profit motive.” (systembolaget homepage).  However, there is just nothing more annoying than realizing you have a dinner party to go to and you are supposed to bring a bottle of wine, and it is 3:50 on a Saturday afternoon and the System closes at 4! 

There are other things too.  There isn’t an overall concept of competition.  Everything is expensive.  You can go pretty much anywhere in Stockholm and expect to pay the same amount of money for whatever type item.  On holidays, nonsensical places are closed, like movie theaters, where to me, logic says “if people don’t have work and kids don’t have school, people will want to be entertained and spend money.”  Stores close early (6-7) daily, and any government type task must occur during business hours or on designated days, depending on the task.  Yes, and taxes are quite high.  But, it isn’t as if they are nonexistent in the US.

I guess I just see these things as so minor, and the fact that the overall mindset works so well here.  So, just to address a few misconceptions I often hear… People do not work long hours.  Quite contrary.  They have 6+ weeks of vacation, many national holidays, 12 months maternity/paternity leave,  one hour long lunches (legally required), fika breaks twice a day, early leaves on Friday, early leaves for any child related event, early leaves for any type of personal business…. People can and do own property.  People have every level of control in their own lives.  They chose their own careers, they live where they want, they can buy whatever they want wherever they want.  They can chose the school their children attend and they can chose the doctor they want to go to.

I guess I could discuss this to a great degree, but the following videos just say it brilliantly.  It is too bad this was taped in the winter, since it is absolutely gorgeous now that it is green and sunny here.   I guess if the US becomes “Sweden,” I would be a very happy person since I need to eventually go back there.

(just a brief note, much of this is taped on a street about two blocks from where we live..for example, when he is running down the street warning the Swedes of the nightmare they are living in.)

I will no longer sit on the bus and hear noise instead of words

A friend of mine in Stockholm recently told a story to me about being home in the US over Christmas and hearing a confrontation in line in front of her at the check out register. Apparently, the man trying to pay was terribly annoyed that the credit card reader had two language options: English or Spanish. He said, very confrontationally to the clerk, “We live in America! Our language is English. Why does it give another choice? If you come to America, then you should learn to speak English!”

I will shamefully admit to feeling similar frustrations. I have been through the drive-up window of fast food restaurants, only to have the employee not understand phrases like “extra ketchup” or “no onions.” I’ve been to stores and asked for another size, only to receive a blank stare. I’ve received notes from the kids’ school, in two languages. Then, I moved to Sweden.

I think everyone should live a part of their lives in a country where they don’t speak a word of the native language. I think everyone should experience the confusion of a subway map and street signs in a foreign language, order from a menu with words that are meaningless, activate a cell phone, receive bills in the mail, attend school meetings. . .and always apologize for their own ignorance. Everyone should stand in the dairy section of a grocery store and try and figure out which bottle is coffee creamer, and not yet another variety of yogurt. Everyone should attend a 45 minute spinning class where only a few words from the instructor are recognized, and instead of following instructions, just follow-the-leader (as ironic as that sounds on a stationary bike). Everyone should receive a letter in the mail that you can make out enough to know is your assigned appointment for your mandatory gynecological appointment, only to go to a very awkward place to take a number from a queue, called out in Swedish of course, to finally visit a doctor that doesn’t speak English.

In my eighteen months in this country, I have never once had a person say to me “you are in Sweden! You are in our country. You need to speak our language.” I, instead, always receive an apology. “Oh, I’m so sorry. I thought you were Swedish. Let’s take this in English.” I did, however, recently, talk to a very friendly and jovial clerk at a 7-11 and he asked me where I was from and I said “here.” He looked at me very confusedly, and then I clarified. I wasn’t from here, but I lived here now, for over a year now. He very lightheartedly said “well, you’re not a tourist anymore.” And, he is absolutely right. I live here now. It hit me at that very moment that this is my home, and it is not only my obligation to make this my home in every way, but also will make me much happier to grasp this culture in each and every way, and the language is one of the key ingredients.

In my own defense, we didn’t move here with the intention of making this our home. We came here for 6 months, and that turned to 9 months. Then, that turned to one more year. In that short time, it never seemed “worth it” to invest in the time to learn the language. Now, it will be yet one more year, and I can’t in good conscious, at the end of what will be at least three years, walk away not being able to do more than order coffee or say the phrase “I speak only a little Swedish.”

I signed up for SFI a couple of days ago. SFI stands for “svenska för invandrare”, or Swedish for Immigrants. It is a government language program, which is completely free to all immigrants. I think it is amazing and wonderful that a country accommodates immigrants to properly assimilate like this. I also signed up for a “language kompis” or a language friend. It is from a website to meet people over coffee or dinner, and practice your native languages together. Between these two opportunities, I intend to learn Swedish. And, according to the SFI website, it could take 6 months. Six months out of the next fifteen months of living here. Six months of going to class five days a week. Six months.

When I go back to the United States, I realize I will have few opportunities to speak Swedish. It might be kind of fun for our family to practice. It might be kind of fun for Bryan and I to talk in code when we are out together. It might be fun to whip out my Swedish ID when I go to a bar and pretend I’m actually from Sweden. But, I do know when we return to the United States, that one of the first things I plan to do, is to thoroughly learn Spanish.

You're sick; it's supposed to hurt!

Whatever. Call me a big baby. I don't really care. I like medicine when I'm in pain. I want Tylenol with a headache, Claritin with allergies and Midol with cramps. I wanted an epidural with delivery and Vicodin after my knee surgery. When the technology exists to make me feel good when I really should feel bad, I want to take advantage of this day and age we're so lucky to be a part of.

One of the most common questions I'm asked by our acquaintances in the US is: "How substandard is socialized medicine?" Likewise, my Swedish companions frequently inquire: "Is it really as bad as Sicko in the United States?" A really fascinating aspect of living abroad is our unique perspective of being caught in the middle of two distinctively different stereotypes...and, each side being not only confident that they truly understand the way the other side works, but that their way is right and better, and that the other way is acutely wrong and weak.

In brevity, no, I do not believe Sicko accurately depicts medical care in the US for the average person. That said, the United States has some serious flaws, especially for those not fortunate enough to have good insurance coverage. For example, we know self-employed people with insanely high monthly payments, on top of high deductables. Even with good insurance, a patient is responsible for a percentage of their care (ie, a surgery could be 10% or more for the patient to personally cover, which could quite obviously still cost someone an exhorbitant amount of money--even with good insurance). It will not be free to have a baby or free to receive chemotherapy or free to treat a heart attack, even in the very best, best case scenario.

However, I or my family haven't been unfortunate enough to require extreme medical attention while living in Sweden, so it seems unfair to discuss this; although I believe, as far as finances go, a person would be better off here in a catastrophic event. What we've had, so far, have been mundane and relatively insignficant events. Yet, these types of issues are the same ones we'd likely contend with in Colorado, so it seems reasonable to compare every day medical care.

I got back from Morocco about a week ago, and was very sick when we got back with some type of food poisoning. After 11 days, I finally decided to go to the doctor, which was Monday. As I've been to the doctor here before without really finding out anything and leaving without any kind of aid, I didn't have high hopes. As expected, after five hours of jumping through hurdles, going from the doctor, to the hospital, back to the doctor and then to a lab, I left with this: "You probably have a bacteria from Morocco. Your body is designed to fix this. You'll probably feel better in a few days. Have you had any blueberry soup?"

I realize the US overprescribes antibiotics, and that consequently, there are now crazy and deadly bacteria that are impervious to normal levels of antibiotics... but, still! I was sick!! I mean, I thought I was going to absolutely die. And yet, no medicine. No hope of medicine. What they believe in here medicinally is a lot of rest and relaxing...and letting your body heal naturally. And, quite apparently from the comments from every single nurse, doctor and lab technician: blueberry soup. What we believe in as Americans is numbing our discomfort and getting back to a normal life of stress, activity, and productivity as soon as humanly (as ironically as that sounds) possible.

And just for a quick update; I got my lab results as I was sitting here typing this. The verdict: salmonella. Yeah, good ol' Africa. Thirteen days later, I feel quite a bit better, but in my mail with the test results, there was still no mention of an antibiotic. However, it does say in writing that I can not cook. Ok, so that works! I'll take it. ha ha.

Another part of socialized medicine is jumping though hoops to get help. I can't help but to think of our easy-going doctor in the US that gets us in the same afternoon in a crisis and definitely gives us something in hand to walk away feeling as though we are on the road to some level of recovery. Maybe he would have prescribed me the wrong antibiotic or too much or too little or whatever, but I would have left with an antiobiotic after going in for a sickness from a trip to Africa.

For example, Bryan had a very serious ear infection, and unfortunately, this was on a Friday evening. The only option was to go to what is closest compared to an urgent care center called the City Akuten. They were able to get him in that evening, but he was the last patient for the weekend. They determined he did have an ear infection and sent a Rx to the government run pharmacy called an Apoteket. There is one Apoteket in all of Stockholm that is open 24 hours, so he went there, only to discover the Rx wasn't there. Who knows what happened, but it didn't get sent over properly. Since it was Friday, they were closed for the weekend, and he was leaving for the US on Monday. The only option was to go to another hospital, wait in line again (this was Valentine's day, so irritating for both of us), see another doctor, pay another copay, and get yet another Rx on Saturday night. Medicine is like gold here. They do not give it out easily.

One of the best pieces of advice I can give anyone considering a move to Sweden is to bring as many over-the-counter meds with you as you can. We have a mini-apothecary. Even if you can find it here, medicine is quite expensive (who am I kidding, what isn't?!). But, many things are Rx only, like Sudafed, and Rxs are nearly impossible to get. Also, fill as many Rxs that you can before you move here and bring them with you. Even if you've had it for years, that does not mean you can get it here. Most likely, unless you need it to actually make your heart beat, you will not get it. They believe that the US over-medicates, and that the pharmaceutical companies dominate doctor's decisions (I guess I believe that too). I was able to get a year's worth of many things approved by my insurance in the US, but after those run out, I think I'm out!

As I was writing this, I checked MSNBC, and incidentally, saw this article which I think is appropriate to include:

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/29641091/

Report: U.S. health care system is a liability
Americans spend a lot more than top countries, but aren’t as healthy

My adventure of the week…the job placement agency

 

I’ve lived in Sweden now for a while, and I have lived here in three different ways with three different perspectives.    We came here once on a business trip and were strictly tourists.  We came here yet again, this time as temporary residents on a short term assignment, yet still void of any personnummers or anything resembling true settling.  Now, we’re here for a while.  We’re trying our best to adjust, assimilate and live as real Swedes in Swedenland.  However, the one thing still lacking for me to feel truly in my element here is finding a job. 

Today, I officially give up.  I have tried.  I have sent resumes, letters, emails, more emails that lead to  even more emails.  Yet, here I am.  I realize I might sound a bit frustrated or defeated, but, I am actually so amused by my experience yesterday that I surrender smiling-- shaking my head a bit, but definitely smiling.

I want to preface my story with this:  I think this company does a great service to many Swedes, so I won’t name it by name.  If you’re Swedish or live here, you’ll know what I’m talking about anyhow.  I had an “interesting” experience,  but that doesn’t account for its entire organization…

That said, I went in to a job placement agency of sorts here about two weeks ago.  After waiting through the obligatory queues, I finally talked to someone that directed me to the computers to begin my job search, naturally (and understandably) all in Swedish.  After stumbling through this (and selecting God only knows what careers of interest since I was going more by “sounds like x” than knowing what the jobs really were) I waited through another queue.  This time, I was told I should make an appointment to talk to the “international specialist.”  Great!!  Someone that specializes in helping foreigners find employment here.  Perfecto!   I was given my allotted appointment (of course, no consulting whatsoever if this time or date is ok), and this appointment was two weeks later, or yesterday.

I punctually arrived to my appointment.  When I was called, I introduced myself to a very distraught and frazzled lady.  She said she was waiting for the interpreter to arrive.  Interpreter?  Before I continue, I must mention that everyone here speaks perfect English; everyone except the “foreigner job placement specialist.” 

She waited for a  few moments, then began soliciting other jobless patrons waiting through their own queues to be the fill- in interpreter.  No takers.  They all looked a strange combination of horrified and terrified at this prospect.  I stood awkwardly through her attempts at convincing them.  After admitting her own defeat, she walked me to her office.

She apologized for her lack of English and asked me a few questions in Swenglish (I was actually pretty impressed in my ability to manage this) and I answered her in slow and simple English.  A few moments in to this process, the interpreter finally arrived. 

I’ve never utilized an interpreter, and it’s actually a pretty disconcerting experience.  When trying to answer questions that require a lot of detail and a lengthy response, it is difficult to know an appropriate pause point, and really how much detail to go into.  Once she arrived, I was once again asked the same questions as I was before, because despite the nods and scribbled notes by my job placement specialist, she didn’t understand anything I had already answered.

Just a few moments in to the meeting, it became quite critical for me to produce a paper that I must have somewhere in my stack.  I explained I came with everything I was asked to bring, but yet there was indeed something missing.  This seems to be a pretty Swedish experience.  They don’t always volunteer pertinent information, and you learn how to do something right by failing the first time (or second, or third…).  I didn’t know to bring this paper.  I asked what I should bring.  I brought what I was told.  I didn’t bring this document.  She was once again frazzled.

I explained the type of work that would interest me (ie writing, copywriting, editing, teaching) and she essentially said that she couldn’t really help me, because Swedes speak English and can do these jobs (I’m sorry, I couldn’t help but to find this somewhat ironic, coming from the foreign specialist).  She asked what I’d applied for already, then proceeded to visit the very websites I told her I had already been to.  She asked me the names of the International schools here, and I told her what they were.  She went to these sites as well (as I spelled out to her the web addresses), went to one, and the” job openings” section of their website brought you straight to this “agency’s” own webpage.  That was funny.

She then wondered aloud (which was of course transferred to me via the interpreter) why the schools had no openings.  I suggested that it was likely because it was the middle of the school year, and I wondered if the schools had filled their positions already for the year.  They both agreed.  That was most likely it.  That was a very good response, a very likely theory.

So, she, at the conclusion of our meeting, offered me this suggestion for finding a job in Sweden:  I should go around to all of the English pubs and see if they would like to hire me!   The grand advice at the end of the day, by the job placement company here in Stockholm, by the foreigner job placement specialist. was to seek out employment on my own, no help at all, by walking around and offering my services to English pubs.  What can I say?  I’m back to square one. 

It’s Ok to be yourself, as long as you’re the same as everyone else

You can usually tell if you are doing wrong here, because people look at you.  There is a right and wrong way to do just about everything here.  There is a day when suddenly everyone is wearing their tall black boots, and their is a day when they put them away for the year.  There is a day to put the boats in the water and a day to take them out.  There is a day to put up a Christmas tree, and a day to take it down.  I have yet to discover the official “rule” book of conduct in Sweden.  It wouldn’t matter.  I wouldn’t be able to read it anyway.

One of our first experiences with “rules” occurred very shortly after our move here about a year ago.  We decided to go to the swimming pool.  While the girls were on slides, Bryan and I decided to relax in the hot tub.  Like a well choreographed display of synchronized soaking, the people in the hot tub would sit in the hot tub until the bubbles stopped every 15 minutes.  Then, they would sit on the edge with only their legs dangling in until the bubbles started again.  In and out.  Up and down. 

Naturally, there is just enough of an American independent mindset running through our blood that we think “it is warmer in the water than on the edge, even without bubbles.”  While we remained in the hot water, the other guests looked at us like we were violating the very core of Swedish history and culture.  It didn’t take many cycles before we were joining the chilly in and out dance. 

After sixteen months, I think I’ve finally managed to observe enough and mimic behaviors enough that  I feel like I fit in rather decently.  I have the stylish  black boots and polished black coat…  Heck, I have a lot of black in general these days!!  My hair has gotten blonder with time, and I’ve learned to accessorize with a big scarf.   And guiltily, I love the frequent comments of  “Ooooohhh, you speak English…but you look so Swedish.”  Yeah, I know it.  I’m a sellout.  I’m an American gone conformist. 

For my whole life, I’ve been complimented on my innate skills of observations and perception.  I’ve had to rely on these talents for survival here.  It’s a big game of watching and copying.  Ohhhh, so you only stand on the right side of the escalator.  Ok.  Ah, so you wear covers over your shoes when you go in the gym to the locker room.  That’s right, you’d never wear “outdoor” shoes “indoors.”  Wait, we’re the only ones talking on the subway.  Yeah.  Subways are for reading newspapers and listening to iPods—unless it’s on your cell phone (volume here is no consideration) or on a Saturday night when you’re slightly drunk.  Wait.  Bumped into?  Apologies are not necessary here.  As a matter of fact, a timid “ursäkta” is a sure give away of a foreigner.

My fourteen year old daughter recently participated in a training of sorts in school.  They watched several movies and had discussions on “awareness” of differences in others.  They discussed homosexuality, teen pregnancy, race and religion.  However, the teenagers realized the irony in this training when they themselves categorize other teenage girls in just two categories:  fjortis or emo—both derogatory terms used to insult the other group.  Whoever you are, you fit somewhere in one of these two categories (essentially wealthy, scantily clad “preppy” girl, to the opposite “alternative” end of the spectrum). 

From the matching rubber playground suits that all toddlers play in, to the thirty-six H&Ms in Stockholm that all the teenagers shop in, there is a clear message of follow the leader here, even from youth.  It’s Ok though. I’ll be back to the US again someday, and I’m pretty sure I’ll fully regain my individuality when I try to pull off these leggings, legwarmers and my oversized gray tunic at Target. 

Sweden 101

After my brief return to the US in the beginning of December and this following story, it became quite clear that before I begin any sociological dissection discussions on the cultural differences of Sweden and the US, I need to clarify some aspects of Sweden:

I was getting my nails done and the manicurist was quite curious about my life in Sweden.  He said “I don’t really know much about Sweden, other than that they are quite wealthy with their Swiss banks.”  I then said “No, that’s actually Switzerland that has Swiss banks, not Sweden".  And, then he proceeded to say “yes, I realize that it is Switzerland that has Swiss banks, but it’s because the two countries border one another that Swedes use the Swiss banks for investments.”  Ummmm, no.  Good attempt at a cover, but no.

I had many of these types of conversations while I was home .  It is quite strange to me what the mental image of Sweden is.  I can’t really recall what I myself thought Sweden would be like before I moved here, but I’m sure I had a lot of misconceptions too.  I had been here once before on a trip, so I had already experienced life here to some degree.  I knew people were reserved, quiet and punctual.  I knew the women were gorgeous.  But, it really takes living in a place to truly get a feel for it’s culture.  There are just many things you can’t observe from a week in a country.

For starters, here is a map of Sweden:

As you can see, Sweden and Norway are sort of a land mass all their own.  Stockholm is on the eastern coast, towards the middle/southern side of Sweden.  There is a bridge connecting Malmö to Copenhagen Denmark (at 38 Euro or almost $50 each way), so technically Denmark and Sweden are attached as well.  Obviously, the northern part of Sweden borders with Finland, so it is possible to drive across, although it wouldn’t be a very economical option from Stockholm.

There are many overnight cruises to the countries to the east of Sweden across the Baltic Sea, specifically to Helsinki Finland, Tallinn Estonia and Riga Latvia.  You can take your car onboard (these are essentially ferry boats with rooms to rent, not a real cruise) and this is a very convenient and inexpensive option for traveling to these neighboring countries.

As you can see, Sweden and Switzerland are not close to one another.  Switzerland borders Italy, Austria, France and Germany.  It would be technically possible to drive from Sweden to Switzerland by going through Denmark, and then Germany, but it would be a very long drive.  According to googlemaps, it would take eighteen hours. 

So, that concludes the complimentary geography lesson for today.  :)  Here are a few other questions and common misconceptions about Sweden:

My personal Swedish FAQs:

Is a Euro-train pass the way to travel throughout Europe? 

Based on our experiences, no.  It seems the trains are very expensive.  However, there are many “no-frills” budget airlines here like Ryanair, which are like an a la carte  style of flying.  There are often flights for just 1 crown, plus tax, which might be around $20.  For example, the four of us flew to Paris, round-trip, and with transportation to and from the airport, it was about $50 per person.  It can be a bit hurdle jumping and playing their game, but if you play by the rules, it is very inexpensive and in our opinion ultimately worth it. 

Is everyone blond in Sweden?

Well, no.  Although many people are.  The funny thing is, blond is rarely blond enough.  It is amusing to see roots showing that are slightly darker shades of blond.  However, this is a place of a lot of immigration right now, so it is becoming quite a diverse city.  But, even I, coming here as an immigrant of sorts, have gotten progressively blonder over the last year! :)

Are women really vain here?  Like, are there a lot of breast augmentations?

I think women are very self confident, but I wouldn’t classify it as the way we think of vanity.  They are very quiet and reserved, so I think that this is often misinterpreted from an American’s perspective.  People in general are very shy, but women are not conceited or full of themselves.  There is definitely a sense of equality and independence here.  And, no, women do have boob jobs here.  Not to stay on the topic very long, but I would have to say, quite contrary.  I think breast augmentations and general plastic surgery is very American, actually.

Is the skiing on the Alps good?

Actually the Alps are in Switzerland.  Although, there is some skiing here, Sweden isn’t really world renowned for its slopes.

Is there a lot of snow in Stockholm?

Surprisingly (pleasantly surprising to us), no.  We are very far north (we’re the same latitude as Anchorage Alaska), but because of the gulf stream, it stays relatively moderate in temperature and doesn’t snow very much.  We’ve also encountered two very mild winters.  All that said, because of the  northern latitude, we have extremes in light and darkness.  In the winter, there are about 6 hours of sunlight.  In the summer, there are about 19 hours of sunlight.

Is there a lot of marijuana in Sweden, being so close to Amsterdam?

First of all, we aren’t very close to Amsterdam at all.  It is about about a three hour flight from here.  And, secondly, NO, there is not a lot of marijuana here.  Where marijuana is relatively easily accessible and mainstream in the US, here it is something that is not culturally accepted.  In addition, the fines and penalties for any drug use are very steep here, so it adds another level of deterrence.  Swedes live very much by a set of rules and acceptance with one another, and marijuana is something that is just frowned upon overall.

Is there a lot of prostitution?  Is there a red light district?

No!  There is certainly no red light district, or any blatant prostitution.  That said, technically, prostitution is legal, but visiting a prostitute is illegal.  This is because of the strong ideal of women’s rights here.  They do not condone prostitution here at all, and once again, this would be something a Swedish person would not do, as it is not culturally acceptable; however, to balance the idea that being a prostitute is the right of a woman if she wants to, that is legal.  I’m sure, like everywhere in the world, it happens, but it is not mainstream or part of the culture here, where it is in many, many other places in Europe like Germany, The Czech Republic, Belgium, Poland, Estonia, or many other countries one may not think of.

Are there a lot of windmills, wooden shoes and tulips?

These are actually in the Netherlands. 

What do you think of socialized medicine?  Is it really free?  Better?

This is definitely worth an entire post all its own.  We’ve had relatively little experience with doctors here, but based on my own experience, I would hesitate to call it better.  It is definitely not free, although there is a cap in one year per person, so in the case of a medical emergency, child birth or surgery, it would be far less expensive.  For occasional doctor visits, it is more than our co-pays in the US. 

Do they speak English in Sweden?

Yes.  They speak perfect English.  As a matter of fact, their literacy rate is over 90%, one of the highest in the world.  As a matter of fact, it was kind of embarrassing when the movers were unpacking our boxes here in Sweden, and the spellings on the box labels from the American movers were simply atrocious, and they all found it really amusing.  We did explain that those spellings did not fairly represent the average American, though!  However, they do prefer to speak Swedish, so we do feel a bit guilty about not speaking Swedish very well ourselves. 

Do Swedes dislike Americans?  What do they think of us?

Again, I can only answer this based on my own personal experience, but I don’t think they dislike us one bit.  I think in a lot of ways, they really like us, although there are stereotypes that go along with being an American, just like there are stereotypes that go along with being Swedish.  I really want to go in some depth about their stereotypes of us (not really what you would guess, I imagine), but in general, they think we are over-consumers, impulse buyers, stressed, and preoccupied with liability.  Now that I have lived outside of the US, and the US is in the midst of one of the biggest economic crisis in history, I can’t say I disagree with these mindsets.  However, they also think we’re outgoing, friendly, funny, and hard working.  I’d really like to talk about this in it’s own post, but here are a couple of examples of why Swedes find us a very amusing country:

 

The last sign really makes me laugh because while we were being moved in to our apartment here, I was conversing with one of our movers.  He was commenting on how funny all of our warning signs are in the US, and he said “Slippery when wet?!!  Duh!” 

Clearly, these are just a few of the questions I am often asked when I return home.  There are many other things I look forward to writing about in future posts.  I welcome any questions as well.